I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
