it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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