There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
