pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
