i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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