and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize