Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
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