Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
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