hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
