You smell like a Billy Joel song
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
