she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Randomize
