I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
