Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
