I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
