Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
im six kinds of drunk right now
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize