Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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