Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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