From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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