how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Randomize