if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Come on in and take your pants off
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