Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
