Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
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