I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
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