Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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