that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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