Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
tonight lets celebrate not being married
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Randomize