google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
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