I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
