If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
