Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
