return my video game
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
