My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Your penis caused this!
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
