Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
