so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
