I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
