everyone is single if you try hard enough
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Randomize
