Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
