i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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