Porn is love you can see.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
