I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Randomize
