i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
