So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
