I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
