Don't you send me to vm
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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