My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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