WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Why is there bacon in the couch?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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