I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
