im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
