i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
