my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
